Casino Nightmares
by Vampire121208
Summary: JAM...set after "Casino Night"... Jim and Pam get together for a breif period, but after Pam realises her mistakes, she leaves. Jim is heartbroken and Pam is pregnant. Where will it go from there? read and review and we'll see :D
1. Making Mistakes Are Easy Things To Do

A/N: This is my first "The Office" fan fiction I've written…and I have a few more saved that I would be interested in releasin

**A/N: This is my first "The Office" fan fiction I've written…and I have a few more saved that I would be interested in releasing depending on the reaction to this….so please feel free to read this and comment… btw this is rated teen because its slightly adult but by no means "M" (at least not yet :D) anyway please review!**

**Dis.: I do not own The Office…or John Krasinski (sadly D:)**

The air is warm as Pam catches her breath. Bending down she retrieves her silk dress from the ground under Jim's desk, sliding it over her hips and up her body.

Jim backs away from her, pulling his own clothes back on. His shaggy hair is even messier, his gentle eyes glisten with un-cried tears and a smile beams on his face.

Both are content, holding each other in the dim light of the Dunder-Mifflin office. Her hair has fallen loose, and he twines his fingers in it.

"Pam," he whispers as he reaches out and traces his fingers across her cheek. "I love you. I always have Beasley." He says as he leans in and kisses her passionately again.

His tongue traces her lips, begging entrance. She opens her mouth and he enters, their tongues dance around each other perfectly. Each made for the other. Lovers.

Her hips subconsciously buck against his, and she feels his growing arousal nudging her hip bone. He brings both hands to her face, and he holds it gently, pressing her lips to his own.

When the two separate to breathe, she giggles softly as she pulls her hair back into a bun at the nape of her neck.

"What?" He asks tiredly, running his fingers through his hair self-consciously. He was genuinely curious what could make this moment funny for her. He knows she felt his arousal, but he hadn't been able to control himself.

"I just think it's funny." She sighs as she kisses him once more.

"What's funny?" he asks, playing her game.

"That something like a kiss, has those affects on us. I mean, seriously, we lasted seven years without doing this. Yet our bodies react like its," she pauses, "meant to be."

"It is." He says, completely serious. His grin is less prominent now, though she isn't looking at his face anymore.

Her beautiful eyes are staring at her engagement ring. Tears fill her eyes. Her voice is thick with emotion as she brings her face back up to meet his pleased expression and whispers "Roy."

"Pam. No. Please. Don't do this…not now." He pleads as she ruefully pushes away from him, snatching her purse from his now disheveled desk top.

"Jim. I…" she chokes out, taking one last look at his face before turning quickly and sprinting to the door.

He falls shell-shocked into his desk chair. "Pam…" he whispers, his heart-broken.


	2. Shattered Stamford

A:N/ This is a little angsty…well actually a whole lot…I got a wonderful review "that this was unlike anything they had ever r

**A:N/ This is a little angsty…well actually a whole lot…I got a wonderful review "that this was unlike anything they had ever read on fanfic." So thank you! And thanks for reading my crazy babbling responses :D anyway…please enjoy the following JAM angst! ( don't forget that reviewing makes me world spin round!)**

**Dis.: Don't own this and I make nothing from it**

Coming into work that Monday, was the hardest thing Pam had ever done.

But seeing his empty desk, completely cleaned off, that was the hardest thing Pam had seen in a while.

She settled herself at her receptionist station, subconsciously looking up at his deserted desk every couple of minutes.

It was a little past 9.30 when Michael stumbled in, a foolish grin on his face as he downed an entire Red Bull at her desk.

"Pam! Pammy! Pam-ster! How was your weekend?" He asked as he tossed the can into her trashcan.

"Fine, Michael. And yours?" she said softly. She hadn't spoken a lot over the past couple of days, and it wasn't like Roy was gonna notice. He was so caught up in his sports and his drinking, that she was just another thing to him.

"Freaking awesome! But I don't wanna gross you out…so later" Michael assured her, and then turned dramatically from the desk.

"Ouch! Today is Jimbo's first day gone? That sucks. It's so quiet in here without him. Don't you think, Pam?" he asked twisting himself back to Pam. "Don't you think Pam?"

Pam sniffled. _So he had gone_. Suddenly images of Jims face as they made love came rushing back to her. She shuddered at the memory of him whispering his feelings for her in her ear, constantly telling her how much he loved her. Roy never said he loved her when they slept together. Never.

"Yes." She mumbled as she pushed herself away from the desk and rushed to the ladies room. As she yanked open the kitchen door, warm tears gushed from her eyes. She slammed into the ladies room and locked herself in a stall.

Sliding down the door, so her back rested against it, she cried. She cried because she knew now that she loved Jim. She loved him so much that it hurt her.

And now, the man she truly was in love with, was gone. Gone because she was too scared to realize the truth. She should be engaged to Jim, not Roy. But Jim was gone, and she sure as hell wasn't asking where until she got herself under control.

But when was that going to be? When was she going to be able to push him out of her thoughts? He was as welcome in her thoughts as she was his. They were one. And he had taken his piece away, leaving her broken and shattered.

She pulled herself up, wiping her nose on her cardigan sleeve and slid the lock out of place. Padding to the sink, she looked at herself in the mirror.

She had bags under her eyes; her red-brown hair was unkempt and knotted. She looked like shit. But it was her eyes that scared her the most, that made her eyes tear up. They looked haunted. Empty.

Suddenly she understood. It wasn't he who had taken the piece away. It was her. She had sent him away. She had run away like a coward after making love with him. World-shifting love making.

Then gone home to Roy, and slid into bed, while Roy sat in the other room watching the game, with no interest in her. She cried herself to sleep that night, and every night since then. Pam felt empty. She felt alone, when she was in a room full of her co-workers.

Shaking her head, she rinsed her face with cold water and returned to her desk. No one looked at her. They had all known long ago about the dynamic between the two co-workers. And even if they didn't understand why Jim was gone, they knew something had happened.

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Pam spent the entire day sitting at her desk. She focused on moving her computer screen so she couldn't look at his desk. She spent lunch shifting her pencils around in her cup, and the rest of the afternoon shredding everything that needed to be shred for three years.

By doing this she hoped that there wouldn't be a repeat her of totally irrational breakdown this morning.

Michael had tried comforting her, but Pam just played it off as PMS. She hoped he believed her, but she deep down she knew that he understood. Jim had after all, told him, that he was in love with her.

So he gave up, leaving her alone again but not before promising herself it would get better. All of it. Not just the PMS.

So maybe Michael wasn't as much of a dumb-ass as some people thought.

At the end of the day, when Roy honked the cars horn for her, she shut her computer down and put the phone on automatic message.

Wishing Michael good night, he suddenly blurted out "Stamford. He's in Stamford, Pam."

She took in a shaky breath, sighed and said sadly "Thank-you Michael."

_Stamford, Connecticut. _He really was gone. She felt a tear escape her eye. She could see Roy's truck from the office vestibule, so she swiped her eyes and put on a fake smile.

Climbing into the cab with Roy, he slapped her knee, causing it to sting slightly.

"What's with the red eyes, baby? You get a paper cut or something? You're too sensitive sometimes." He said harshly as she stared out the window at the passing scenery.

**A:N/ Review! This will be a time elapsed story…so I hope you guys don't mind a little drama next chapter ( which will be set a month or two past casino night…) btw…let me just say that this story is ignoring the two wonderful seasons after this episode aired…because well…I just bought season 2, and my muse showed up after Casino Night, so that's the way it works….anyway please review!**


	3. Confessions of a Broken Women

This was the third time she had been sick this week

**A:N/ So I used to major in Bones fan fictions, but then decided to try my hand at some Office love. And this was the brain child. This is a very angsty chapter for three fourths, and the last part is pretty fluffy to leverage out all the thought running through Pam's head. Btw… In this story I made Roy the bad guy, cause I just don't care for anyone who gets in the way of JAM! Anyway please read, review and enjoy!**

**Dis.: Don't own the office…no amount of wishing will achieve that**

This was the third time she had been sick this week.

As she huddled over the toilet in the apartment, emptying her stomachs contents, silent tears ran down her face. Roy lay unconscious in the bed, sleeping off his hangover from the night before. When she had run from the bed twenty minutes ago, he hadn't even noticed her being gone.

And now as she vomited, she was holding her own hair back, crying tears of fear and hurt, and cursing herself. She knew what was wrong with her. She knew the reason, even if she hadn't tested herself. She could just tell.

She was pregnant.

What was she gonna do? There's no way it is Roy's. She and he hadn't slept together for some time, as much as he begged her. She felt empty, and sleeping with him made her feel dead normally. There was no way of telling what it would do to her now.

There was only one other man she had ever been with. And that fit into the time scale perfectly. The baby was Jims. And Jim had made it pretty clear that he was gone. She hadn't heard from him in almost two months. Two months since Casino Night. Two months since they were together, and she ran like a coward from the room.

This child was Jims.

She had three options.

Call Jim and tell him. Tell Roy the baby was his, when he was drunk, and pray to God that he didn't care enough to figure the math out. Or she could always terminate…

No. As unsure of everything else she was, she was positive that she could never terminate the pregnancy. This baby was a part of Jim and herself. And she missed Jim so much, missed his goofy smile, and his sloppy hair.

She sobbed as she wiped her mouth off, and climbed into the shower.

Turning the scolding water on, she blasted herself under the stream of water. Steam filled the bathroom, and she cried the hardest she ever had. Her hands found her stomach and wrapped around it. It was still flat. It would be for another couple of months.

She was pregnant. She was a mom.

How had her life gotten like this? Engaged to a raving drunk, pregnant with another mans baby. She wasn't supposed to live like this. She was supposed to be in a house with a terrace, married to Jim. And they were supposed to be thrilled about this.

But instead she was standing alone in the steaming shower, crying herself out.

"Pam! Aren't you done in there yet? I gotta take a shower." Roy's voice boomed, and Pam snapped back to reality. She shut the water off and climbed out, wrapping a towel around herself.

Unlocking her safety, she opened the flimsy door and he stormed past her.

"It's about time." He grumbled as he climbed in the shower.

"I'm sorry Roy." She whispered as she exited the room.

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Work was work. She still had this. She could still count on Michael to act like an idiot, and almost get them all fired.

She could still count on Dwight to make her smile. Then she would catch herself looking over at Jim's desk, without thinking. Her body would shudder slightly as she tore her gaze from his still empty desk.

It had been three months since he transferred after their meeting on Casino Night. He hadn't called her or anything. She sighed bitterly and returned to her solitaire on the computer.

She still hadn't told Roy about the baby. He was drinking even worse lately, coming home at four in the morning, not getting up till noon. Missing too many days of work, he was on his way to getting fired.

She didn't know what to do anymore. She had always thought of herself as the brain in the relationship. The smart one. The thinker. But ever since Casino Night, her brain had been in a fog. A fog of hurt, shock and sadness.

So when the door opened to Dunder Mifflin, she didn't turn to face him. She didn't twist her chair to see who had entered the office. She just mumbled. "Welcome to Dunder Mifflin." As she continued her game of Solitaire.

"Pam." It was all he said.

It was all he needed to say. She spun her chair around, knocking a stack of paperwork to the ground.

"Jim." She gasped as she flung herself from the chair. Next thing she knew she had wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face in his neck.

Suddenly a sob wracked her body. She couldn't hold it in anymore. She let out a small moan, and his arms immediately wrapped protectively around her.

"Jim. You're back." She whispered as he released her softly. People were beginning to look at them.

"Yea I guess I'm back." He smiled as she grinned up at him, a single tear fell.

He fought the urge to wipe it away. She still wore Roy's ring. She hadn't let his feelings for her, in her heart. She had shut them out like he secretly knew she would.

"Jim, I need to tell you something." She said quietly as he dropped his back off at his desk.

"Break room?" He asked slowly. His voice was suddenly shaky. It was taking all his self will not to drudge up the memories of making love to her on this very desk, only three months ago.

"Okay." She agreed and the two tried to sneak away from the main office into the break room.

Once seated at a table near in the back, their usual table, Pam stared at him. His shaggy brown hair had grown longer, his eyes seemed tired. He himself looked intensely back at her.

He had tried to forget her for three months. But he hadn't been able. He had met other women, but always compared them to her. He was hopelessly in love with her. But she wasn't in love with him.

"About that night…" she began, but he silenced her. "If you wanna forget it, I already have." He said harshly.

"Jim. I never said I wanted to forget about it. It was wonderful. Magical. Life changing…" she said slowly, her own voice growing softer and mellower as she continued.

"It couldn't have been that great, Pam. You're still engaged to Roy I presume?" He asked sharply.

"Jim. There's a reason." She tried to assure him as he pushed off from the table.

"Sure, Pam. I love you…and after we have mind blowing sex, you're still with him? I don't think I can let myself hear this." He told her, but she reached for his arm.

"Jim, I'm pregnant. And it's yours." She whispered as his face swiveled back to her own. They were alone in the room, their co-workers respecting their privacy and staying outside.

"Mine?" he whispered as he sank back into the chair he had just vacated. "Why didn't you call me? Why…" he asked slowly, realizing that even if the baby was his, she still had stayed with Roy.

"I thought you were angry at me, for leaving you that night." She said she wrung her hands in front of her. "Your leaving broke me into pieces Jim. And when I found out about the baby, I didn't know what to do."

"You should have called me, Pam." He chided her as she wrapped her hand around his arm.

"I only stayed with Roy because I didn't know how to tell you. I don't want to raise this baby on my own Jim. And I don't want to raise it with Roy. I want to raise it with you. With its father." She whispered, and he leaned towards her and let himself kiss her. Sweetly and passionately, all in one.

When they separated, she reached for his hand and led it to her flat stomach. Laying his palm flat against her, she whispered "A baby, Jim."

"Our baby." He mused, his voice thickening with emotion.

**A:N/ Please review….i hope you enjoyed yourself… I'm trying to write something different than most fan fictions, a lot of emotion and character development, so review!**


	4. Realazations

"What are we gonna do Pam

**A:N/ Chapter 4!! Please enjoy and review when finished…reviews are fuel for my fire…which Ryan didn't start this time…you did!**

**Dis.: I don't own the office…though I do own that incredibly lame joke in my A/N :D**

"What are we gonna do Pam?" Jim asked after the two had sat in silence for a few moments. Jim reveling in the news that he was going to be a father, and Pam amazed at how complete she felt with Jim back in her life.

"I stayed with Roy because I didn't know if you were ever coming back. I was so much a coward, that I didn't know how to tell you." She sniffled, her voice quiet and shaky as Jim looked into her eyes.

"Does he know? Does he know about us?" Jim asked, and Pam shifted her stare to the table.

"No, Jim. I couldn't tell him. I am just beginning to understand what this baby means to me, and then to have to tell Roy it's another mans? I don't think I could do that." She whispered as Jim cupped her chin in his one hand.

"You're gonna have to, if you want us to be together. But it will all be okay, because I know how you feel about me now Pam." He assured her. His eyes stared into hers, and she had to fight back tears.

Her heart was mending itself, sewing up the tear that had appeared when she left him that night three months ago.

"How?" She sighed, resting her suddenly exhausted head on his shoulder. She had been feeling so much shame and cowardice lately that it was all beginning to fade from her, now that Jim was back.

"I can come with you to tell him. I won't let you do this alone. I promise I will be there for you and the baby. Always." He told her confidently, but she shook her head no.

"How do you know how I feel about you?" She whispered as he brought her face up to his with a bent pointer finger under her chin.

"You could have lied to me. You could have never told me, you could have said its Roy's. You could have gotten a…" he began, but his face paled.

"Jim…" She said slowly. He snapped out of his morbid thoughts and looked back at her. She was so thin. Her normally smiling eyes looked empty and cavernous. Her beautiful smile was hidden behind a mask of exhaustion.

"Yes?" Was all he whispered.

"I'm in love with you." She whispered back and he scooped her into his arms, meeting her mouth with a passionate kiss.

He pinned her to the back wall of the break room, his mouth moving softly against her own as she moaned out in pleasure.

"You…have…no…idea…how long I have waited….to hear you say that…Beesly" He panted as he kissed a trail from her neck to her lips, again and again.

"I love you Jim. I love you. I love you." She gasped as his hand slide up the bottom of her sweeter.

Though suddenly, they weren't alone anymore. Michael stood staring at the entrance to the room, his mouth open in a wide "O". He had in his hand, his "World's Best Boss" mug, and in the other was holding the empty coffee pot.

"Wow! Jim and Pam getting it on in the break room…kinky!" he giggled at his own joke.

Jim backed away from Pam, and she fixed her sweeter. Both blushed, but Michael continued with his jokes.

"Careful guys…that's how babies are made!" he teased, but Jim and Pam looked at each other side ways.

"Michael, we would appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone about this…" Pam begged, her voice ragged and her breath coming out in pants.

"Sure thing Pammy. It'll be our little secret." He smiled as he pretended to lock his mouth and throw the key over his shoulder.

"Michael. She's serious." Jim said smoothly, as Michael nodded, replacing the empty coffee pot. He began to back out of the room, smiling like an idiot, when he suddenly stopped and said quietly "Congratulations."

"Thank you Michael, really." Pam said quickly, and Michael finally left the two alone again.

"As nice as that was, it can't be good that he knows about us." Pam whispered as Jim took her hand and kissed the palm.

"Yes, you are probably right there. But at least he doesn't know about," he stopped, placing his palm on her stomach, "this little guy."

"I love you Jim." She gushed, and he kissed her gently, bringing back to her memory the images from three months ago. Before it could get too carried away, he pulled away.

"We better get back to work." He said, sadly. He brought his hand up, and pushed a loose strand of hair behind her ear. Kissing her forehead, he reached for the door and opened it for her.

"Yea, that's a good idea." She agreed and the two left the break room that morning happier than when they had entered.

**A:N/ if anyone has any good ideas about how she should tell Roy…I already have Roy's reaction planned, but its just the logistics of placing him and these two in the same place….anyway please please please review and tell me what you think so far!**


	5. The Truth Hurts The Most

Pam was entering her fourth month of pregnancy, hiding her ever growing stomach under sweaters and puffy blouses

**A:N/ Roy is told. We learn a little more about Pam, and we understand just how much Jim loves her…I really enjoyed writing this one, because it ends happily :D**

**p.s. thank you to bingbangboom714 for the inspiration for this chapter :D its really appreciated :D**

**Dis.: Still don't own The Office…though I am gonna try and help free Jenna Fisher. **

Pam was entering her fourth month of pregnancy, hiding her ever growing stomach under sweaters and puffy blouses. It helped that her desk was so low, making it so that she was able to sit comfortably and work.

But her constant trips to the ladies room, and her random consumption of vending machine junk-food, had most of her co-workers gossiping and guessing her condition.

Her looks to Jim, and vice-versa, also had the water cooler attention. Everyone guessed what was coming, but when it happened…no one expected the reaction.

**PJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJPJ**

Pam clutched her water bottle. She sat at an empty table at Poor Richards, sipping her water slowly and methodically. Underneath the table, her free hand laid across her stomach, rubbing it anxiously as she waited for Roy to appear. She allowed her wardrobe to relax when she wasn't at work, so her simple tee shirt and jeans fit her comfortably and showed off the baby nicely.

Soon it would be closing in on the month mark that she had moved out of her shared apartment with Roy. She had told him that she needed her space, time to think things over.

She had thought things over. With Jim, dozens of times.

So she had finally asked Roy to come tonight. To talk.

Jim sat at the bar, drinking a beer, casting nervous glances in Pam's direction. He hated the idea of leaving her on own to deal with Roy. But she had insisted she do this herself, but allowed him to stay and keep an eye on the situation.

So they had settled the deal, he would sit at the bar, she at a table. Both sat waiting for their worst nightmare to enter the door, both waiting for their worst nightmare to explode into a million pieces of anger.

The bell above the door tingled, and Pam knew who it was.

Suddenly he was next to her, ripping her hand from the bottle of water, forcefully bringing it to his lips.

She grimaced as she looked him over. He had gained weight, maybe five or six pounds. His normally beady eyes were more bloodshot than she'd ever seen them. He had obviously lost his razor, a thick crop of beard growing on his face.

"Pam…" he began, his speech slurred. He was already drunk. Wasn't he ever sober?

"Roy, I asked you here to talk." She said curtly, tugging her hand from his grasp. His arm shot out and grabbed her hand again, harder than before. She winced and she heard Jims stool slide farther out from the bar.

"Where's your ring? Lost it or something?" Roy growled, and she swallowed. She had hoped he would be sober, but he had once again dashed her hopes. Like always.

"Roy, I took it off." She said simply, her voice sounded sweet and small next to his gravely growls.

"Why?" He hissed as a flash of hurt and then anger, went across his face. He had loved her, once, along time ago. Now she was just a possession to him, someone to come home to, some one to take care of him.

"Because I don't love you anymore, Roy." She choked out, tears brimming in her eyes. Being pregnant and telling her fiancé that she didn't love him, were really wrecking havoc on her emotions.

"Pammy." He whispered and for a moment she felt a pang of her former love for him, then it was gone. She remembered the baby, her hand stretched across her stomach and it was enough to snap her out of it. "Pammy, isn't there anyway?" he begged, but she knew it was all a show for her benefit. He had acted it out many times before, when she had tried to leave him before.

"Not this time, Roy." She said sadly, pushing herself from the table. Leaning down for her purse he grabbed her upper arm, pulling her back to his eye line. That was it. She heard Jims stool slid all the way out and suddenly he was behind her, his hand on Roy's grasp, prying his fingers away.

"Halpert? What do you want? I was asking my fiancé a question." He growled, but Jim didn't release his hold on Pam's arm. Though it wasn't like Roy's had hurt, it was protective, loving.

"I'm not your fiancé anymore Roy." She hissed, shocked at her tone of voice. Hormones were really changing her.

"Says you." He growled back. Anger swelled inside her, causing her to stand up completely from the table.

Her tee-shirt didn't do any good of hiding the baby bump, but she didn't help it along by laying her hand on it. She reached for Jim's hand, prying his eyes away from Roy, and laid it along with hers.

"Says we." She said sharply. Her mind was beginning to clear, and she knew the scene they were causing, but this had to be done before she could move on with Jim.

"You're pregnant?" Roy asked sounding flabbergasted.

"Yes she is, Roy." Jim said quickly, enjoying his part in this. A little too much.

"What do you have to do with this Halpert? Why don't you just run off you little idiot." Roy bit back. Jims face turned red, but I grabbed his hand before he could form a fist.

"He's the father." I said slowly, registering Roy's reaction with every word. His face went from annoyance, to hurt, to shock, to plan hatred.

"You slept with her? You slept with him while we were together? You….are a…whore!" He yelled, pulling his hand back, preparing to slap me in the face. I coward, from force of habit mostly, not expecting Jim to deck him. Plain and simple, square in the face, deck him.

He fell back, and Jim pulled me into his arms, and we left, as he guided me to the car. He helped me in and climbed into the drivers' seat.

"Jim…" I began to say, but he stopped me.

"Pam, I will never hit you. You understand?" He made me promise that I understood, when I suddenly felt the need to kiss him.

I grabbed his jacket lapel as he put the key in the ignition and turned his face to mine, planting a solid kiss on him.

He kissed back, perfectly, and when we separated I whispered "How did you know?"

"How did I know what?" He questioned as we pulled out of the parking lot and started the drive home.

"That he hit me, Jim. How did you know?" I whispered, not tearing my gaze from his face, illuminated by the light from the dashboard.

"You always wore long sleeves, so I guess I always knew somewhere in the back of my mind. And even when he almost hit you right then, the way you shrank back, before he even hit you…I just snapped." He said, his voice growing softer with each word, until he was barley whispering.

"I love you Jim." I told him as we pulled into his driveway, our driveway, and he turned the car off.

"I don't think I will ever get tired of you saying that." He said romantically, kissing me once more.

**A:N/ Yay! I get to do fun baby stuff for the next couple of chapters, so it should lighten up a little unless I decided to throw in this plot twist I have floating around in my cranium…idk…anyway please review! Its always appreciated :D**


	6. Kicks Like A Rabbit

Jim got out of the car and walked to her side, opening the door and helping his pregnant girlfriend climb out

**A:N/ Little bit of a fluffy moment here…kinda surprise ending, but not really that shocking…please enjoy!**

**Dis.: Don't own The Office…but do your part and help free Jenna Fisher!**

Jim got out of the car and walked to her side; opening the door and helping his pregnant girlfriend climb out. She grinned, and clutching his hand, the two entered the offices of her doctor. They were going to find out the sex of the baby today, and tomorrow Jim was going to begin painting his old roommate, Marks, room.

Jim's hair was shaggy and adorable, while his polo and khaki's acted as the perfect offset to his petite and gentile girlfriend. She only measured in height to his shoulder, but her stomach made up for her height. At six months pregnant she was larger than most at eight.

She wore a simple maternity blouse, and her favorite pair of jeans. Her hair had grown longer in the past months, but she hadn't bothered to cut it, knowing how much he loved to wrap his fingers in it while they were being intimate.

Settling into two empty chairs, both kept their hands intertwined, murmuring to each other. Suddenly Pam remembered all the conference room meetings at Dunder Mifflin, where she and Jim would sit in the back and make jokes the whole time. She smiled and squeezed his hand as he flipped through a Sports Illustrated, laid out for the waiting husbands, or maybe the mothers.

"Pamela Beesly? The doctor will see you now." The nurse called, standing by the entrance to one of the examination rooms.

Pam stood, with a little bit of struggle. So Jim comfortingly placed his hand on her lower back and helped out of the chair before pushing himself up from the sitting position. Holding hands, the two entered the examination room and the nurse closed the door informing them the doctor would be in shortly.

Jim looked around for a seat, and after finding one, pulled it over so that he was next to the examination table. He took one of Pam's tiny hands in his, and kissed her palm gently.

"What are you thinking about?" he whispered, not wanting to disturb the peace of the moment. She turned her face to his and kissed his forehead lovingly.

"I was thinking about the first time I felt the baby kick, and how you jumped up from your desk when I called you. And then how we had to tell everybody." She giggled remembering the moment.

_It had been the beginning of last month. Pam and Jim had arrived earlier than normal and settled easily into the normal daily routine. _

_Dwight was trying to encourage Jim to sell his car, and invest in rabbit farming, so Jim just nodded and cast glances at Pam as if saying "please tell me your hearing this"._

_But suddenly Pam felt a sharp sting in her abdomen. She winced, her hand automatically flying down to her expanding stomach. She felt it again, and this time she knew what it was. Overtaken by joy and emotion she cried "Jim!"_

_He shot from his desk, his desk chair skidding into Michael's office door. "Pam! What's wrong? Are you guys okay?" he asked, his voice sounding nervous and concerned. _

"_I felt it kick." She whispered and his expression changed from fear to elation. He grinned, ignoring Dwight's comment "You guys? Jim, there is obviously only one person at that station right now." _

"_Can I?" he whispered, kneeling at the side of her chair and placing his hands against her stomach. A crowd had gather around the receptionist desk, but Jim and Pam only had eyes for each other and her growing abdomen. _

"_I felt it." He said slowly, his voice astonished and awe-struck._

"_Felt what?" asked Michael who had now joined the crowd gathered at Pam's desk. _

"_The baby." Pam whispered, not even regretting announcing her pregnancy. _

_There were gasps, one "ah-ha! Told you so!" and Michael's confused "Baby? Pam's pregnant? Who's the father?" _

_But Jim just stared at her stomach, his hands never moving as he said the words she'd been waiting to hear all her life. _

"_Marry me, Pam."_

"Hi, I'm Dr. Heather Grink. I know you usually have Dr. Smithson, but she's on sabbatical so you're stuck with me. But don't worry, I have warm hands." The doctor greeted them, snapping both out of the pleasant memory.

Jim grinned, and Pam smiled. Both were eager to learn about the baby, not very concerned about what doctor was where.

"So, Miss. Beesly, if you will just lay back we should be able to begin to ultrasound." The doctor said causally as she readied the tools.

Pam stretched back, rolling her shirt up so that her engorged stomach was bare. She looked to Jim, and saw that he was looking at her stomach, his eyes loving.

"And I'll just spread this cream and then we'll get started." Informed the doctor and Pam felt a cold gel spread on her stomach. It was cold, but she could handle the coldness if it showed her the baby.

Suddenly, a loud thumping filled the room. It was soft at first, but grew in strength as the doctor moved the ultrasound wand around her stomach.

Tears fell from Pam's eyes as she listened to the sound, memorizing it for all time. She reached for Jim, and his fingers intertwined with hers once more.

"Pam is that what I think it is?" whispered Jim, his eyes trained on the ultrasound screen.

"Yes, it's the babies' heart beats. And they sound good and healthy." They doctor said softly, punching buttons on the key-board and suddenly the image of two babies appeared on the screen surrounded by blackness.

"They?" Pam choked, the realization of the doctors words sinking in suddenly.

They.

Twins.

Two babies.

"Yes, you caring twins Miss. Beesly. Congratulations. Now I understand you're interested in the babies' sexes?" the doctor asked, moving the wand farther around Pam's large stomach.

"Yes." Pam whispered, because Jim had not regained his power of speech as of yet. She squeezed his fingers and he snapped back to reality. Kissing her forehead softly he leaned in. Wiping his eyes with his free hand, he was unable to believe that those visions of perfection floating on the screen were his children.

"A healthy baby boy and healthy baby girl. Both appear to be developing on schedule, and both are receiving the necessary nutrients. I'll just print you a few copies of this and then you two are free to go." Dr. Grink smiled, clicking the buttons once again and the image faded.

Pam sighed; her free hand flew to her forehead as Dr. Grink cleaned her stomach off. When she was satisfied that all was in order the doctor excused herself, leaving an emotional Pam and a silent Jim.

"Jim, talk to me." Pam whispered, her hand swiping stray tears from the corners of her eyes.

"Twins." He whispered the first words he had spoken in almost twenty minutes.

"A boy and a girl." Pam mused, toying with the hem of her maternity top. She always knew that this baby was special, but twins? How magnificent it was, two bundles of perfection instead of one. Two perfect examples of Jim and herself. Two new Halpert's to welcome into the world.

" I love you Pam." Jim said suddenly, his voice full of conviction. " And we're gonna be just fine. Two kids? Its just our second one, a little earlier than planned." He grinned, sending her into a fit of giggles.

"I guess your right, Jim. I guess your right."

**A:N/ Well? Does this fluffiness make up for the angsty-ness of the past chapters? I certainly hope you didn't mind the twins thing… I have just always wanted to write a JAM baby story and now I get the chance :D thanks for taking the time to read it, but please review if you can…its always appreciated and never taken for granted how amazing your comments are :D **


	7. Telling Memories

**A:N/ School started so my updates will probably be more on the weekends…here is a little present for all of those you who subscribed and favorited…thank you all D**

**Dis.: Still don't own The Office…and Jenna Fischer is still being held captive in Rainn's trunk!!**

Seven months pregnant, Pamela Beesly continued working at Dunder Mifflin. She was slower than before, her cumbersome stomach getting in the way of sitting comfortably at her desk and she now made more trips to the bathroom than anyone else. But she was still working, needing something to distract from her excitement and anxiety over the babies.

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Hand in hand, Jim and Pam walked into the offices of Dunder Mifflin. Her winter coat was tight around her middle, her stomach stretching the fabric to its limit. A simple knit scarf of pink and blue was wrapped around her neck, a present from her parents on news of the twins.

She had put off telling them to last possible minute, but it was impossible to keep it from them forever, so she summed up some very sparse courage and told them herself. With Jim by her side, of course.

They had not spoken to her for days afterward, angry about not being told sooner, and not being told what was going on with Roy. But she had let them alone, let them come to terms with the 

road her life was taking. And at the suggestion of Jim, she even turned off her cell phone for a couple of days.

And in a way, with telling her parents about everything, Pam realized that she was coming to terms.

She was thrilled to be pregnant, thrilled to be engaged to the right man for her, and thrilled to be where she was. But she couldn't help this feeling that it was all messed up, in the wrong order.

That she was secretly terrified of being a mother.

But she had told Jim, last night in fact. She had been holding in her feelings for a while, sure that he wouldn't notice, but unbeknownst to her, he had. And he was relieved when she had finally confessed to him why she had been so quiet lately.

"_Jim," Pam whispered softly as the two lay in their shared bed. She didn't know why she had chosen to tell him now, at the three in the morning on a random Tuesday, but she needed to get this off her chest._

"_Mmm? Yea babe?" He grumbled in response, his head rising slightly from his pillow. His hair was getting floppier, and his toned chest rose and fell methodically as Pam laid her hand across it, feeling his heartbeat. _

"_I'm scared." She said quickly, and her tears damped the corner of her pillow case. _

"_Shh, Pam, it's alright." He said, trying to comfort his heavily pregnant, emotional, seven month pregnant fiancé. "I'm scared too, you know."_

"_Really?" She sniffled, swiping the corners of her eyes with the sleeve of her night shirt. She had taken to sleeping in the Eagles sweet shirt Jim had given her when they found out she was having a boy._

"_Of course! Pam, we've never done this before. I'd say we have more than every right to be a little scared." He comforted, pulling her closer to him so that their faces were close enough to see the others eyes. _

"_I love you Jim Halpert." She whispered, closing her eyes, and kissing him sweetly. _

"_I love you Pam Beesly." He whispered back, his hold tightening on her. _

_Both closed their eyes, slowly drifting into dreamland._

_Pam felt the weight lift from her shoulders as Jim told her that she was allowed to be scared. He made it okay. _

_He would make everything alright. _

_Always._

Hanging up their coats, the two kissed sweetly and separated to go to their respective desks.

Soon Pam had made it over to her desk, settling into the chair, adjusting herself so that she was somewhat comfortable.

"Hey, do you need anything before I get started over here?" Jim asked, as usual, before he made his first sales call of the day. There would be dozens after that, and somewhere in the middle Pam would ask for a bag of chips, mostly to save him from going insane.

"Nope, just a smaller stomach." She teased, popping one of her own jelly beans into her mouth. She had developed a craving for them. She had kidded Jim that she had only kept them around for him, but when her craving kicked in, she was thankful for the bag she kept in her desk drawer.

"Hey, not too many green ones. I don't want the babies to come out green." He teased back, brushing his fingers to her cheek before Dwight cleared his throat and Jim finally sat, rolling his eyes at Dwight's clear annoyance.

"Public displays of affection are discouraged in this office, Jim." He said, his squeaky voice bouncing around the small room.

Jim groaned and replied "Yea, get back to me when your 'girlfriend' is pregnant. Then we can talk." He ended the conversation by picking up his phone and angrily punching the buttons.

Pam chuckled. Jim and she had visited Toby last month, after the unfortunate incident with Michael, so Jim knew full well the boundaries of PDA. And much to Pam's dismay, he was respecting them.

_When Jim and Pam had arrived at work the Monday after the babies' first ultrasound and confided in Michael that they were indeed having twins, he insisted that Pam would be able to work as long as she felt comfortable with. _

_Both had thanked him numerous times, but began regretting informing him so early when he couldn't contain himself anymore and rushed into the main office area cheering "Twins! Twins! Did you hear that everyone?"_

_Jim coughed, his face blushing. Pam grimaced, but stroked her exceptionally large stomach, taking an odd pleasure in Jim's discomfort. _

_Michael ignored Jim, and continued smiling. He soon began shouting off orders to Angela that there would need to be a baby shower pronto. Suddenly his shouting and whooping stopped, until he patted Jim on the back saying "I always knew you had it in you," and broke out into another peal of laughter. _

_Jim coughed again, running his hand through his shaggy hair. Pam reached over and caught his hand as it was about to travel once again through his hair._

"_He's just kidding." She whispered, kissing his palm. He smiled and wrapped his arm around her shoulders, bringing her into his side. _

"_I know. But still, I mean he's talking about us," Jim dropped his voice low enough so only Pam would hear, "doing the deed. It's just uncomfortable." _

"_Soon he'll just forget and move on to something else. So just let him run it out now, and then we don't have to worry about it anymore." She said, trying comforting him, trying not to laugh at his discomfort._

"_Um, you guys?" Toby asked quietly, suddenly standing next to Pam, a hurt expression on his face as his eyes took in her growing abdomen. _

"_Yea Toby?" She said, trying to ignore the hurt on his face. She knew all about his crush on her, but she was happy with Jim. Happier than she could ever be with anyone else, she'd even tried._

"_I know this is pretty boring, but its protocol. I need to see you both, to talk about office relations. Stuff like what your gonna do when the baby is born." He said softly, smiling sadly._

"_Babies." She immediately corrected, and regretted it almost as quickly. _

_His already downcast face fell more._

_She reached a hand out to his elbow and got his attention. _

"_Toby, I'm sorry about everything." she whispered in his ear, sure that Jim was focused on Michael's 'baby' routine._

"_Its okay, Pam. really, congratulations." He said, his sad smile lifting slightly._

"_I guess we can get together around lunch if you don't mind. Jim and I are trying not to take to many breaks, with two times the mouths and everything." She joked, and he smiled. _

"_Lunch it is. Oh and Pam?" He said as he was about to walk away. "You're beautiful pregnant women, you know. You glow." _

"_Thanks Toby. Thanks."_

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**The clock struck four o'clock. The office employees were silent, working on last minute paper work, finishing off another dull day at the office.**

**Pam had just finished her third straight round of solitaire, and as she leant back in her chair to stretch, her IM dinged.**

**JHalpert****: Sore?**

**She smiled at the screen; sure that he was watching her face. **

**P.Beesley: ****Nope. Just bored. I just finished my third round of solitaire. You?**

**J.Halpert: ****Fourth. Isn't there anything fun to do here Beesley? **

**P.Bessley: ****hmm…I can think****of one thing we could do that would be VERY fun P**

**J.Halpert: ****You sure know how to****torture****a guy, you know that?**

**P.Beesley: ****We could actually start working on baby names, Jim****. **

**J.Halpert: ****I guess we should. Are there any you want? And please don't let them be like Winifred or Teddy. **

**P.Beesley: ****D nope, I just have a strange affection for the name Jim****…**

**J.Halpert: ****Oh come on! We have to get more creative than our own names.**

**P.Beesley: ****Fine…what do you think?**

**J.Hapert: ****I don't know…maybe Nathan for the little guy…you can guess a girl's name**

**PBeesley: ****Kate…Nate and Kate the twins…how Brady Bunch DO you want our family to be Jim?!**

**JHalpert: ****Our family. I like the sound of that.**

**PBeesley: ****Our family. Me too. D**

"**Good." He whispered, standing in front of her. Popping a jelly bean in his mouth as he smiled.**

**A:N/ Please review…I tried really hard on this and I hope it was enjoyable to read…thanks for taking the time to read now please take a few seconds to tell me your thoughts about it...pretty please!**


	8. The Obvious Choice

**A: N/ Jim and Pam go shopping at the local Target! (p.s. I like adore Target! Yay!) Please read, enjoy and review! I really do appreciate all your advice and support…sorry this has taken so long to post, but I had really terrible writers block and I just sat down this afternoon…and this came out! I hope you like it! Review!**

**Dis.: I don't own the office…but for a couple of bucks you might be able to own a signed pair of JKras jeans! (can you say Christmas list?!)**

"My God, where do you wanna start Jim?" Pam says, grinning from ear to ear. Jim chuckles and looks down at his fiancé. Her amber hair is longer now than it has ever been, while her skin is glowing beautifully. But you can hardly notice her skin, when your eyes are drawn to her enormous stomach.

She and Jim stand, holding hands, in the baby department of the local Target. Neat rows of baby outfits and child rearing materials are laid out in front of them. Pam's pale little hands gripped the handle bar of the couples shopping cart, in anticipation and anxiety.

A helpful Target employee, whose name tag reads 'Brenda!' came to stand in front of them. "First time parents?" she said sagely and Jim nodded, while Pam grins and tries to focus her words into sentences.

"Would you like some help? I understand that this can be rather overwhelming." She says slowly, drawing Pam into the present. Again Jim nods.

"Well, we can begin with the beginning I guess," she says cheerily, directing the two over to the infant clothing. "Do you know that baby's gender? Or are we waiting until the delivery?" She asks, smiling and nodding down to Pam's stomach.

"Yes, a boy and a girl. Due mid-February." Pam informs her, pleased by the sales woman's reaction.

"Twins! That's a wonderful treat; you two must be so excited." Brenda is smiling now, as she mentally lists the items she will try to tell these people they absolutely need double for, considering its twins.

"Yes, we thought we'd better get some things before their arrival. " Jim said quickly, his eyes glancing around the store, trying to look anywhere but the money hungry eyes of the saleswoman.

"Naturally. I hope you don't mind me asking, but are you planning on dressing the kids alike? We have a wonderful special going on Tommy Hilfiger for Tots. Or maybe some Laura Ashley blankets for the babies." She was really trying her best to push the most expensive stuff on the two, hoping they would bite and just forfeit their wallets to her.

"No, I don't think I wanna dress my son like a princess if you mind. Or vice versa." Pam said, her hormones working a number on her. She didn't like how pushy this woman, no girl, was being.

So with a deciding smile, she said simply "I think we've got it covered from here Brenda, but thanks for your help."

"Of course, but if you need anything just remember I'm around here somewhere!" she said, her fake enthusiasm making Jim chuckle.

"Will do Brenda," he assures her, as Pam hooked her arm in his and led him towards the newborns section, "thanks."

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"I think this one's kinda cute." Jim said, holding up a matching baby suit. It was pale green, with a tiger cub on the front and an attached bib. "Only 6.99! And look here Pam; they have a pink one with a lion club for our girl."

"Fine, put them in the cart Jim. But we really have to come with names soon, because its plain mean to keep calling these two 'our boy' or 'our girl'." She said slowly, as she pushed the cart farther down the isle. She would occasionally stop and pick out up an outfit, inspect it, and then toss it in the basin of the cart.

"Cool. What do you suggest Mama?" He asked, tossing the two little outfits into the cart and rubbing his hand across her belly.

"I don't know, maybe something like Hannah, or Jonathan. But I always liked the name Maria…" She mused, moving the cart into the isle with blankets and diaper bags.

She spies a tan shoulder bag she liked, on the bottom shelf, and begins tugging on Jim's sleeve. She motioned to the bag and says, as sweetly as possible, "Can you get that for me?"

"Yup." He answers her, bending down and retrieving the surprisingly heavy bag.

After looking it over, she puts it in the cart and moves onward. Jim however did not.

"How about… Nicholas? Dean? Samuel? Katarina? Elizabeth? Morgan?" He lists, causing Pam to twist herself so she can see behind her.

"What? Where did you get all those?" She asks him, annoyed at how much work it took for her to turn around. 8 months of pregnancy was really wearing on her, and she'd be very happy once the babies were born.

"This book," he said, smiling, and holding up a book, "A Thousand and One Baby Names"

"Why didn't we think of that earlier?" She joked, throwing her hands up in the air in mock frustration.

"I don't really know. I guess we are not very experienced at this kind of thing." He explained, throwing the book casually into the cart, where it landed with a terrible thud.

"Hey! It's a thick book." He said when Pam gave him an annoyed look, which disappeared when she saw an item behind his head.

"Jim! Look at that. It's the cutest thing!" She crooned, pointing behind his head to the shelf of picture frames.

"This one?" He asks her, picking up a pink and blue picture frame. In golden letters it said "Our Twins!" and then it had three spots free for photos.

"It's adorable. See here," she pointed to the top spot, "is for their ultrasound picture, and then the bottom two are for their baby pictures." A tear escaped her eye, and she swiped it away with the back of her palm. _Damn hormones._

"Well, for 14.99 it's the perfect finishing piece to the nursery." He states, placing the picture frame in the half full cart, on top of two matching blankets.

"Thank you, Jim." She whispers to him.

"It's a picture frame Pam, but you're welcome baby." He is smiling, but becomes unnerved when she doesn't speak again.

"Pam?" He asked tentatively. "Are you alright?"

"Wonderful, Jim. Wonderful."

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"It's perfect!" She whispers, rubbing her stomach. Her Eagles sweatshirt is becoming too tight on her, but is also too comfortable to give up. In her bare feet, sloppy ponytail and sweatshirt, Jim never felt more attracted to her.

They had spent that entire Saturday by hanging up baby clothes, dressing the room and ordering take-out. Pam unpacked bags of baby articles, while Jim assembled the baby gift from his parents. A mahogany crib now stood proudly in the center of the back wall, and above it there hung the picture frame.

"It's perfect." She said again, leaning up to kiss her wonderful fiancé.

"It is, isn't it?" He said, puffing his chest out, just a slight hint of manliness in his tone of voice.

"Yes. But you have those reports you have to go over, and I have those paintings I wanna finish for the show…so as much as would like to spend all night in here…we can't." She said ruefully pushing him towards the doorway, on her way hitting the light switch.

"Wait! You go get working on your painting, and I will get the trash, like the gentleman I am my dear lady." He tells her chivalrously, as he re-enters the room and reaches for a plastic Target bag

_THUNK!_

"What the…?" He questions, leaning over and flipping the switch on. Casting his eyes downward he sees what had made such an unattractive thump.

The baby names book lay, face up, on the beige carpet. Chuckling to himself, he picks it up and calls for Pam, hoping that she hadn't started working yet.

"Yea? You rang? " She asks, entering the room, wiping a handful of brushes on a dirty rag.

"Why don't we blow work off tonight, and look over some names?" He asks her, hope rising in his voice.

She couldn't let him down today, not after all the work he had done. So she smiles and stops prepping the brushes.

"Okay, meet me in the living room in ten minutes, Mr. Procrastination."

**A:N/ Please feel free to review and tell me if you liked or did not like my take on Jim and Pam out of the office…but you can review and tell me anything you want… heck, you can even tell me the time of day, or weather! Just please review (and this is NOT me begging…thankfully because you all have been so wonderful, and reviewed this story so far….I have not felt the need to beg…yet) **


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